There may be, like, two of you out there that noticed I haven't blogged in a super ultra long time. I can only imagine the kind of agony you are suffering as you wait...wait...wait for me to end my blogstipation and just write something, ANYTHING, even a stupid list of ten things.
Well, wait no further, my friend. Your dreams are about to come true.
Ten Reasons I Haven't Blogged in a Month:
10. School. Things have been chugging along in the homeschool department. I'm drowning in open and closed syllables and adjectives and adverbs and graphs containing all the birthdays of all the people we know. Oh, and plenty of whining.
9. Homegirl. If you haven't noticed, I have a baby, people. A very adorable chunky monkey whose chubby cheeks require regular and enthusiastic kissing. Sometimes there just aren't enough hours in the day to contain all the baby smooching.
8. Thing One and Thing Two. They're nice kids and all, but they're sucking out my soul like the dementors in Harry Potter.
7. The Choir Christmas Program and the B Natural on the Key Change in my Low Register. It took a lot out of me.
6. Being sick. But then I stopped being sick and was awesome instead. True Story.
5. Napping. What's the point of being a stay at home mom if you don't take regular naps? It's just wasteful if you don't.
4. Reading other people's blogs.
3. Pinning things on Pinterest, like recipes I'll never make and home decor I'll never be able to afford.
2. Ashton and Demi's divorce. It's really eating me up inside.
See? All of those are totally legitimate reasons for abandoning the ol' blog for awhile. I don't know why you're so upset about it. I was always going to come back. I WAS! Don't look at me like that! You don't own me! Whatever. You're ruining my life!